Much like that of an addict or an alcoholic, I realized two years ago that I had a real problem. And again, like that of an addict or alcoholic, it took a big life event to shake me enough to open my eyes to what that problem was, what it was doing to my life and that I needed to do something about it. For those of you that know me personally, you know precisely what that event was, how it shook me and the journey it sent me on for the last two years.

As an overachiever, I started a business at the age of 23…as a woman, clearly, and at the onslaught of an economic crisis and survived. I won a number of personal and professional awards by the time I turned 30, was growing KKPR by 67% year after year, and grew bored. I started to wonder what was next and instead of looking within, I looked out. I started looking for other opportunities that would challenge me because the “high” I was getting from KKPR wasn’t enough and I needed something more. This is where I began my “startup” life and created a couple of startups that made me so busy, they nearly killed me. I was certainly on the path of a heart attack or stroke by 40. I saw it but didn’t care. I only cared about that feeling of creation and being “successful” by measure of what society tells us. It took the passing of my grandmother before I realized just how bad my addiction had become.

That big life event sent me straight into my midlife crisis and only as an overachiever would do, my midlife crisis came a good ten years before most — at the ripe age of 35. Although one might consider I am still struggling with my addiction as I create a brand relaunch for my company with a handful of organizational initiatives outside of the “normal” realm of “what we do” in the middle of a pandemic….I beg to differ. This brand relaunch and these initiatives have been 14 years in the making; I just didn’t know it.

The last two years, at least once I realized that I had been as Amy loves to say – over glorifying “busy”—I started getting out of the other businesses I created that didn’t feed my soul and just made me “busier than a one-armed paper-hanger;” I started to take more time for myself to start to figure out who I am (believe me, I am still looking!); and I started to take a hard look at KKPR to see what I still loved about her and what needed work. Like all LTRs, – for those of you who don’t know, LTR = Long Term Relationships – KKPR and I need to grow, learn, and change together and we took a little detour. Turns out, I had neglected her for some shiny new businesses that ended up being not the right fit for me and really needed to figure her out, to win her back. And much like any woman who has been neglected, she made me work pretty damn hard for it.

What we’ve learned about each other in the last two years, and what I have been working really hard on the last 9 months, is our shared vision of who we are today; not who we were when we first started, not who we were 10 years ago – hell, not even who we were 2 years ago. Who we are today is all that matters.

This pandemic has given me so much time to think. It’s thrown me a ton of curveballs and I have been navigating – like most – good days and bad days with the emotional stability of a wooden roller coaster, but as an addict, that’s typically when I do my best work. This rebrand started back in January but was a slow roll because of client projects, but also because it required ME to focus on our direction, which still felt unclear. Now, in perhaps the worst of times, our direction has never been so clear.

Today, my team and I launch our new look and vision for our future. I’ve done the work. I’ve looked at our worst parts and our best. I have dug deep to find out what really fuels me and my soul and I found my truth. Supporting other women, helping each other grow personally and professionally, and elevating and inspiring others to do the same is really what KKPR and I are all about.

We may look different than we did, but we are still here creating our hearts out for our clients that are pivoting in tough times, for new clients that want to create, and for us. This pandemic has done nothing but give us the time to realize the things we love, cultivate them, and become a closer-knit team with real shared goals as humans, not just coworkers in an agency.

Crisis always creates opportunity; for us it wasn’t starting another or new business – see, I have kicked some of my bad habits of being an overachiever! –, it was about really being true to us. It was learning who we are and being true to ourselves.

So, here’s to doing the hard work and being true to yourself in an uncertain time because that’s when you’ll find your True North. In life, who we are and where we go is all that counts.